I liked this guy. I think it bordered towards love because the hurt was too much.
Love has a lot of meaning and right now, I don’t even have a meaning for it but what I do know love isn’t, is selfish.
So I liked this guy, let’s call him Tom. Tom was and is handsome, tall, light skinned, glasses(I am a sucker for guys on glasses sadly), very very intelligent. What drew me to him wasn’t the physical attributes, it was the conversations we had at little times, his brain, his laughter and the way his eyes settled only on me
Almost glistening because of the glasses. His small lips quirking up when you said something funny. The few times he held my hand, I could swear my heart reached the roof
But all these emotions and we still broke up. He took my heart and tore it, in pieces. I can’t even explain how much it hurt because it hurt.
There is one thing I can’t tolerate and it is cheating and lying about it. I have lots of plans and if you grew up knowing what you like, you’ll know what you hate and I hate those two
Love is a powerful feeling. It consumes you, burns and burns and if ever it get quenched, you’re left in ashes either for good or bad. But either way, if it was love, it will hurt.
Like Sam Smith once said in his song Palace, real love is never a waste of time and that’s the only comfort I have. I learnt from it, I grew too and so it isn’t a waste of time
He played me, he cheated and he lied. I believed him the first time he lied about his relationship with this girl, I forgave him and I let him back in. I questioned my self worth because maybe he won’t have done anything, if I was enough and for a while he used that on me
But I couldn’t handle it anymore. People knew the truth, they were talking, saying he was playing with my heart and I just couldn’t handle it anymore. Couldn’t pretend that I wasn’t hurting myself, my self worth and esteem. I couldn’t go on and so we broke up
I cried. I hurt. For a long while, I kept crying and what made it worse was that I had to deal with seeing him and I couldn’t get away from it. So I was really tortured. I can’t wish it on anyone. You become a shell of yourself and that hurts
I had a lot of questions I wanted to ask him. Was I not enough? Where did we go wrong? What didn’t I do right? All these questions burned my mind to the ground till I had no more strength for questions lurking around my head
I let myself experience the heartbreak, I cried a lot and then one day I couldn’t. I told myself, this would be the last time I cry over him and it was. I don’t know how that happened but it did. It still hurt but I no longer cried and soon the hurt slowly disappeared
It took me a long while but I got over it and I can say this story without tearing up. Though sometimes I wonder what could have been but I don’t let it dwell. I just know whatever happened was for a reason and its all on him and not on me. I stopped blaming myself and that became my redemption.
Welcome to House Of Teens and its been a long and beautiful ride with each and everyone of you here. I love all my subscribers, followers and all of you who grace this blog. Its because of you we are here and its because of you we are on the top 100 on Feedspot.
P.s if you have any heartbreak and ice creams story you’d like to share, the comments are open for you and I hope to read them. Thank you once again and don’t forget to have fun. Its just one life.
House Of Teens 