We’re Lost And We’re Not Found

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The world is vast. Too vast, very wide and with a lot of varieties. Sometimes it feels like I’m in the middle of a very large expanse of sea filled with humans.

I am confused, no one is listening to me, nobody notices me, everyone is talking above me, I am nothing to them. I am choking, my eyes are misty, heavy with a longing to just find a way, to stop being stuck, to be like all these people rushing off to somewhere, with a destination.

If only I can find somewhere to rush to, to know and be certain of my purpose and the path to follow to get there but I am stuck until I can find at least somewhere to go, to have a destination. Sometimes and most times it feels overwhelming, that no one on earth can understand how I feel, can grasp the threatening feeling encompassing me.

I feel alone, empty and sad.

I can’t help the feelings residing deep in my chest but then I turn, and I see someone else. Wild-eyed, stuck too.

Lost.

The pain in my chest eases a bit, I try to wave at them, those people that are as lost as me. We are lost tonight, today, forever. Not for long though. To those walking, finding themselves with a destination, with a sort of purpose, we look stupid, useless, purposeless but a teeny part of them wonders what it would feel like to be lost again.

How can we be so lost and happy? With wide smiles and light hearts? Who are these lost souls?

“They’re teenagers. I am a teenager, with recklessness in my chest”

I am lost and I have a lot of time to find myself but right now? Right here in this moment, I’ll raise my feet and dance to whatever is on, I will savor whatever feeling resides in me because deep down, I sense it, that one day the world will invade my chest, and rip apart little by little, all the innocence and fireflies that lay in my chest and then I will be purposeful, but at a cost.

I no longer long for a path, for a sense of purpose, instead I lock hands with the others around me, I lift my face to the world, my middle finger high, my smile wide, my fingers interlocked with every teen out there as we give the wind the power to take us wherever it pleases and whenever.

Today we will be lost, tomorrow we can be found.

Coronavirus has invaded our lives and it is in every corner, never to be forgotten. But we can choose to take our focus somewhere else, place our fears in a box and toss it out. It won’t be easy but we will do it, we can do it. Let’s keep complying to the social distancing, wearing our face masks, practicing personal hygene and protecting ourselves. The first way to get rid of this virus, is to not be scared.

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